“Isn’t it funny how the most unforgettable scenes can be the most trivial?”

“Isn’t it funny how the most unforgettable scenes can be the most trivial?”

Time for another “life” post. No EVE Online to be found here, sorry friends.

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“A man chooses,…

“A man chooses, a slave obeys – Andrew Ryan”

The Steam summer sale is on and gamers around the world are emptying their wallets and forgoing meals to purchase some games to see them through the months ’til Christmas. I’m restraining myself since I’ve got that EVE Online subscription to worry about (decided to forgo subscribing another character though, as painful as it may be to finally write it down), but I’ve picked up quite a few games. Hopefully I end up making the most of my money and actually playing them; apparently these sales are so alluring for others that games are purchased that are never touched, left in that digital collection like those toys bought for us as kids that we never played with.

Anyway, a few days ago I bought Bioshock. Definitely not new, and this won’t be a review or guide because I’m sure there are plenty of those out there already. I have never played it before, but I watched the trailer back in 2008 and it freaked me out. Personally, I cannot stand horror movies nor horror games, something my friends go great lengths to exploit.

In addition to my inability to stomach scary shit, I’m also a little forgetful. Bioshock Infinite came out much more recently, and the blue skies and breathtaking steam-punky setting had me totally forget about my initial impressions about the other two Bioshock games. So I picked them up and started playing them, and well, it was tough going.

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It’s always dar…

It’s always darkest before the dawn…

A bit of both worlds this time.

Today I was playing EVE Online and I got incurred another lost ship. For those who don’t know, every time you lose a ship in this game, you’ve gotta repurchase yourself another ship, whatever you’ve fitted to that ship, etc. You start from scratch, ship-wise. There is no save, no continuation from a previous point, with that ship.

So needless to say, losses have an impact in the game. And recently I’ve been managing to lose a lot. It hurts. It hurts because I fly so often, and I keep thinking that surely this means I’m getting better. I’m noticing what I can engage, what I can’t, where my ship’s weaknesses are. But all in hindsight, and I never recall it in the next fight.

Frustration rises. I felt like giving up entirely. Then Pandora goes and plays a song by Florence and the Machine, a song whose lyrics contained the words of the quote above: “…It’s always darkest before the dawn.”

It helped. A bit. Then I recalled a quote from Patrick Ness’ Monsters of Men series:

“It’s always darkest before the dawn, Todd.”

I look at him, baffled. “No, it ain’t! What kinda stupid saying is that? It’s always lightest before the dawn!”

So then, which one’s right?

Continue reading It’s always dar…





  1. the state of being gratifiskied.
  2. something you feel when your sell orders sell in EVE.
  3. the act of killing a ship that drops lots of loot.
  4. Archaic. AoE doomsdays.


6th June, 2014. My sell orders made me a little richer.


“Orders went, gratifisked.”

“Loot fairy gratifiskied me!”

“Oh bby gratifisk me right here, right now.”


rekt, winning


Developed in conversation with Grazi Attorr. Thanks to dictionary.com for assisting with structure.